Monday, March 10, 2014

Daylight Stupid Time means we're all sheep

Daylight Savings Time (DST) is bullshit. The whole concept just pisses me off. Time is one of things that we are taught is constant; you can't freeze it even if you want to. In that respect the saying holds true, but that's about it. However, it's not very constant when we can push it ahead or back an hour at whim.

The thing that really pisses me off about DST is that it promotes the idea that as individuals we can't just say, "no, I'm not gonna do it that way. This is how it's gonna be," but as a society we can. Not only that, but you don't have a choice. Everyone else says we're doing it, so you're doing it too. Deal with it. Jesus, I hope everyone else doesn't start eating wolf testicles twice a year; I really don't want to do that.

Stop fucking with things. Just leave it alone. How was this even decided on? I doubt it was voted on. Some assholes just said, "this is a good idea. Here's why. Trust us," and everyone else just went along with it. Bullshit. Sheep. What about me? What if I don't agree with the practice? Oh that's right, nobody cares what I agree with. News flash: a shit ton of people think it is stupid and the 'benefits' aren't worth it.

The reasons for DST are purely economical; don't let them tell you otherwise. The more daylight we have, the more shopping we'll do because even though the clock says it's late we see the sun and feel like we have more time. We spend more money. And this crap about using less energy is just stupid. And for the love of Me, don't believe the garbage you hear about it being for the farmers. They actually think that the practice is disruptive. So there. Leave the clocks alone. I'm tired of this shit. We shouldn't be forced to do stupid things like this, but again we have no choice. Thanks, society, for once again proving that you're stupid and you'll do whatever you're told because you're all a bunch of submissive tools and giving me no choice but to submit with your silly asses.

Forever rebelling,

- The Absurdist

Monday, March 3, 2014

A free iPad?! Yes, please!

I recently did a small social experiment on Facebook involving my "friends." I knew what the outcome would be, but I wanted to prove if, if to nobody but myself. I know that the people I know are ignorant and selfish, but proving it made me chuckle more than a little.

You see, I post a lot of current news on Twitter and Facebook: the war in Syria, the uprising in the Ukraine, gun violence in America, etc. The thing is, nobody seems to give a shit, let alone two. Who knows if they even read my whole tweet or status update. I'd bet they don't open the links I post even with headlines telling of tens of thousands of people being murdered and tortured. Those tweets and status updates don't get retweeted, liked or commented on. Nothing. Silence. You know what does get a lot of response? A free iPad. That's right, a fucking tablet.

I went on Facebook and posted "who wants a free iPad?" Sure as shit, within hours I had more private messages, comments and likes than I had in weeks on any of the IMPORTANT things I had said. My "friends" were eager to jump on that offer like it was a steak and they hadn't eaten in days. On the one hand it was satisfying to be right yet again, but on the other hand it made me more sad than I had anticipated. Sure, I was right, but I guess there was a little piece of me hoping that I would be surprised for once. I've always hoped for more from people and I'm constantly disappointed by them.

The moral of the story? Fuck the people being slaughtered in Syria. Fuck the uprising and increasing violence in the Ukraine. Fuck Russia threatening to step in against people they would crush. Fuck the increasing tensions in Venezuela. Fuck homosexuality being illegal in supposedly civilized countries. Fuck civil rights violations across the globe. Where are the iPads? Can I get one? Where? Wait, it's free?! Where is it?! TELL ME! I NEED TO KNOW!!!

Your moral superior,

- The Absurdist